Despair and Hope

Indeed, in our hearts we felt the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead.  (2 Corinthians 1:9)

Instead

(The following post is an e-mail I received during Northview Church's 30 Days of Prayer campaign. The original can be found here.)

REFLECT

You have been down many paths. All of them have taken effort and involved choices. Some paths you took with other people; some paths you walked alone. You will never pass that exact same way again. And you have brought something back with you from those places.

You have memories of these paths…some pleasant, some unsettling. You gained experiences from these paths and choices…some precious, some traumatic and some you now wish you had avoided. You brought back beliefs and impressions of how things are and how things work.

Did you know that God wants to redeem the hard things you have been through? Did you know that He can transform the results of the bad choices? Did you know that, despite the limitations and pain you feel, He is still in control and He is love?

Did you know that, in all of this, you are the prize of God, meant for the eternal display of His splendor? There is something much bigger going on here than what you see.

PRAY

Lord, I don’t understand why things have turned out this way. In many ways, I don’t see how you can fix things or make my life have meaning and true value. However, you have told me that you have this all worked out, and that you have my eternal best interest at heart, that you have a purpose and a plan specifically for me. I surrender my right to understand and my desire to control. May I simply believe, trust and follow. Amen.

READ

ISAIAH 61:1-3 The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me, because the LORD has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the LORD’s favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion—to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendor.

Confusion

Trust in the LORD with all your heart

and lean not on your own understanding;

in all your ways acknowledge him,

and he will make your paths straight.

Disappointment

It's tough to give thanks in all circumstances.

I know that it's a natural part of life to be disappointed--either in what happened that you didn't want to happen...or in desires that never seem to materialize. Add to this the regret that comes from poor decision making or the despair of missed opportunities, and I think everyone finds themselves in a position to feel sorry for themselves and choose to think about what's wrong with life rather than all the blessings they experience.

It's at times like these that I tend to hold The Person Responsible's feet to the fire to explain himself: Why is this happening? Why didn't you do something? Why did you let this happen to me...don't you care about me? How is this fair? Will this pain last forever?

I think these are all fair questions. The real problem comes in WHO these questions are directed to...

If I choose the direction of my life, I am The Person Responsible...and I rarely have good answers to the questions of my heart. I don't have the power or perspective to say it's all part of
some master plan that is for my best interest long-term. This "responsible person" can't get out of bed and to work on time most days...

But if I've given my life over to Another who is all-powerful and has the perspective of eternity, and I follow his lead, then my questions are met with love, understanding, and the promise that it will all turn out to prosper me...that even my mistakes fall under his authority and sovereignty. I may not see the final result, but He does, and I can trust Him when he says it's going to he OK.

I've lived my life both ways...but the latter is much easier; I have the freedom to just be broken and ask the questions...and let someone else carry the weight of responsibility for the answers.

Gotta Love Live Music

The Friends of the Library held a fundraiser tonight at Busters, and a friend and co-worker filled in at drums. Good job, Mike!

Here's to live music everywhere! I forgot how much I enjoyed it...

Hidden Among Us

I just spent the last hour talking with and listening to two men in our church who work with the homeless ministry, and I'm trying to digest what I've just heard.

They described streets and whole neighborhoods of homeless shanties in Lexington--where they congregated, who all was helping serve the homeless, and what issues they face. One man was on staff with the church, but the other was an engineer by day who spends his weekends among the homeless, even leading a church under a bridge downtown.

They talked about mental illness, the challenges of getting transient patients medicine, and how even after doing due diligence in how they give money and resources to those in need, these two street-wise men still get taken and see their gifts resold for money. With smiles they described double-checking doors to make sure none of their men didn't unlock one so they could sneak back into a church or meeting place after the all left. One told how hard it is to identify and get help to homeless women; they are often leary of shelters, having been taken advantage of by the largely male homeless subculture. They were both excited to get a few recently-purchased tents into the hands of a few men they knew were seeping in the elements.

I was most amazed that they seemed to know all the same people--that the network of those helping meet needs is so small in a city of a quarter million people. I think I need to know more about a problem that has seemingly hidden in plane sight from me all these years...

It's A Filling!

Born Nov 2 at 12:26 pm. Papa and filling are resting comfortably...